tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733289016000331233.post1300715816115042477..comments2024-03-28T05:05:30.116-04:00Comments on mainewords: first impressions - Voicesmshatchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06308916014310536449noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733289016000331233.post-12555595961836162402012-01-04T23:59:33.753-05:002012-01-04T23:59:33.753-05:00Intense! I liked the crit commentary. :)Intense! I liked the crit commentary. :)Lydia Kanghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00484415427764822386noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733289016000331233.post-26495936241066951292012-01-04T18:20:15.880-05:002012-01-04T18:20:15.880-05:00What a scary place to be when you're an eleven...What a scary place to be when you're an eleven year old girl...the new girl who can now hear voices.<br /><br />Very good premise and your suggestions are great to strengthen the read.Angela Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03324366495151363782noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733289016000331233.post-26558397429403668952012-01-04T13:22:20.109-05:002012-01-04T13:22:20.109-05:00Happy New Year! I love your header pix. It's...Happy New Year! I love your header pix. It's beautiful! <br /><br />I like the advice about getting the readers on her side. I have an opening like this and was given the same advice. I can totally relate. I like the premise as well. Very cool.Mina Burrowshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14483363743530076604noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733289016000331233.post-91161101438393438682012-01-04T11:33:21.377-05:002012-01-04T11:33:21.377-05:00While this isn't a new idea (accident followed...While this isn't a new idea (accident followed by extra sensory ability), the voice is good. Starting with the game is a great suggestion--meeting the "normal" Calllie, lots of action, then the accident. End of chapter. Opening chapter 2 would be this one. That would avoid any flashbacks or having to feed in the backstory of the game. This is off to a great start.cleemckenziehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15456109243453726483noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733289016000331233.post-36632924573769922952012-01-04T11:16:18.840-05:002012-01-04T11:16:18.840-05:00I agree with Marcy. Starting with a disoriented MC...I agree with Marcy. Starting with a disoriented MC is disorienting for the reader as well. Better to ground the reader in the world first. That said, I like the premise.Krystalyn Drownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12895353579071997640noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733289016000331233.post-43476830058439419092012-01-04T10:33:52.540-05:002012-01-04T10:33:52.540-05:00Hi Marci
This is a great premise Cindy.
I think Ma...Hi Marci<br />This is a great premise Cindy.<br />I think Marci's point was great. Starting with the action and the pain would really draw me in. Going with Callie into her strange new world and it feeling like a painful echo.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15459671422564355990noreply@blogger.com