the sad plight of the American male

There is a new commercial on tv trying to sell something by using the "team Jacob/team Edward" slogan. If you don't know who Edward and Jacob are I suggest you read the Twilight series by Stephanie Myers. If you're like me, you'll rip through all 4 books in record time (I even went so far as to drive to Augusta to get the fourth book because my local bookstore was closed when I finished the third book). At any rate, the whole Edward and Jacob thing got me thinking about how these are the new fantasy boyfriends for teenage girls: a vampire and a werewolf. And if you want your fantasy a little more mature then try the Sookie Stackhouse series or watch True Blood (the HBO show based on the book) and then consider whether you prefer Vampire Bill, Eric, or Sam, the shapeshifter. All of which makes me wonder, how on earth is the poor American (or otherwise) male expected to compete with these fantasy men? They are always extraordinary good looking, protective but not smothering, great listeners, offer absolutely mind-blowing-out-of-this-world-sex and (more importantly in my opinion), the possibility of immortality. What chance does the average guy have?